The One Post on this Blog
Hi. I’m Stacey and I have a lot to say.
Mostly, I want to talk about how even now, in 2018, I’m often the One Female in the room. Yes, this mostly happens in my career, but it also happens in other aspects of life. That deeply-held belief that we don’t know anything about cars, plumbing, engineering, how machines work, and can’t figure things out on our own.
There are a lot of women out there these days that are highly successful at coaching women to be less passive, deal with imposter syndrome, and to make and attempt to achieve their goals. I love these women. I am friends with some of them! They have helped me a lot with their presence on the internet, with putting themselves out there and allowing those of us that need it desperately to feel a camaraderie with them while we privately deal with a career and life that lags behind in gender equality by decades. With this blog, I would like to put my story out there - how I got where I am and how some of my mentors and role models also got where they are. I’ll try to tackle some big topics. And lots of small ones too.
STEM IS WHERE IT’S AT! Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics (STEM) is a HOT topic these days. Women in STEM, smart girls, young engineers, etc. Why can’t we retain them? We can attract them to STEM, but they don’t stay. Why? 🤔 I know why. I have been there, lived it, fought for a long time and finally exited stage-right.
Women can do anything! How can we have a family and a high-powered career in STEM? We cannot. Not without sacrifices. There will always be sacrifices and choices to make and those women who really seem to “have it all” are 1. The outliers and 2. Have a support system that most of us can only dream of - or actually do not want. And we are being lied to at every level, beginning as young as Elementary school age when we are told that “Women can have it all now! Things have changed!”
I want to be a Doctor when I grow up! Wait, I changed my mind, I want to be a Scientist! A truth finder! A seeker! A discoverer! A trail blazer! And I will change this archaic system from the inside out! I will work through it on my own terms and be successful at being a wife, mother, sister, daughter, scientist, professor, artist, and friend. No I won’t. Because you can’t be the perfect all-of-those-things at the same time. I will have to make some hard choices and turn away from some things that made up a huge part of my life goals. And then I had to deal with the emotional and mental aftermath of how that affected me long-term.
I’ll let you inside of my head and tell you about what it’s like to have generalized anxiety that is still pretty much untreated (the meds don’t really work), a long and impressive family history of poor mental health, and the perfect storm of perfectionism, codependency, creativity, non-traditional intelligence, and overdeveloped empathy.
I work best with interaction so your comments, questions, and likes/shares will fuel me. Please interact!
Mostly, I want to talk about how even now, in 2018, I’m often the One Female in the room. Yes, this mostly happens in my career, but it also happens in other aspects of life. That deeply-held belief that we don’t know anything about cars, plumbing, engineering, how machines work, and can’t figure things out on our own.
There are a lot of women out there these days that are highly successful at coaching women to be less passive, deal with imposter syndrome, and to make and attempt to achieve their goals. I love these women. I am friends with some of them! They have helped me a lot with their presence on the internet, with putting themselves out there and allowing those of us that need it desperately to feel a camaraderie with them while we privately deal with a career and life that lags behind in gender equality by decades. With this blog, I would like to put my story out there - how I got where I am and how some of my mentors and role models also got where they are. I’ll try to tackle some big topics. And lots of small ones too.
STEM IS WHERE IT’S AT! Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics (STEM) is a HOT topic these days. Women in STEM, smart girls, young engineers, etc. Why can’t we retain them? We can attract them to STEM, but they don’t stay. Why? 🤔 I know why. I have been there, lived it, fought for a long time and finally exited stage-right.
Women can do anything! How can we have a family and a high-powered career in STEM? We cannot. Not without sacrifices. There will always be sacrifices and choices to make and those women who really seem to “have it all” are 1. The outliers and 2. Have a support system that most of us can only dream of - or actually do not want. And we are being lied to at every level, beginning as young as Elementary school age when we are told that “Women can have it all now! Things have changed!”
I want to be a Doctor when I grow up! Wait, I changed my mind, I want to be a Scientist! A truth finder! A seeker! A discoverer! A trail blazer! And I will change this archaic system from the inside out! I will work through it on my own terms and be successful at being a wife, mother, sister, daughter, scientist, professor, artist, and friend. No I won’t. Because you can’t be the perfect all-of-those-things at the same time. I will have to make some hard choices and turn away from some things that made up a huge part of my life goals. And then I had to deal with the emotional and mental aftermath of how that affected me long-term.
I’ll let you inside of my head and tell you about what it’s like to have generalized anxiety that is still pretty much untreated (the meds don’t really work), a long and impressive family history of poor mental health, and the perfect storm of perfectionism, codependency, creativity, non-traditional intelligence, and overdeveloped empathy.
I work best with interaction so your comments, questions, and likes/shares will fuel me. Please interact!
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